never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Randomize
