he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
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