Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
so much tequila, so little girl.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
