Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Randomize
