Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
i think im in europe. pls send help
Randomize
