Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
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