too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
