I want to make a zoo with you.
i barfeds in our rink
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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