i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
