Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
