I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Randomize
