Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
