she looked like the bat from fern gully.
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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