Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
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