if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
