And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
My dad is sitting where you rode me
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
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