I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Randomize
