This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Randomize