im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
