The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
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