dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
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