my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
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