just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
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