He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
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