To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Randomize
