talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
