We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Who put my cat in the fridge?
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
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