So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
I have tasted many bathrooms
Randomize
