Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Randomize
