So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
I'm sobbing to NWA
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
