I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
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