he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
You pole danced in your parka.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize