I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
i believe in u and ur pee
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
You did what with his pubic hair?
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