Is my lip ring still in your hair?
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
