Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
Randomize
