if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
