she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
Randomize
