One girl and one boy is just not enough.
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
