Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Randomize
