Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize
