we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
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