we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Sorry about my life...
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
Randomize
