If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
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