"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Randomize
