Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
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