i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
OPIZZABONMYDICK
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize
