Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
