Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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