Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
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