READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
Randomize
